New life.

Thank God for the friends who don't hate me right now. I don't understand how someone moving warrants anger towards that person. People move it's a fact of life. Sometimes they move without notice. It doesn't mean I'm abandoning friendships or don't care. I do care. My friends were the ONLY thing that I was thinking about when it came down to the final deciding moments. I thought maybe as long as I have my friends I could stand to live in Rhode Island. But happiness is more than just friends. I got off that island I never really wanted to be on in the first place. So what. I did something good for myself. I have more job opportunities and can afford rent. I'm supporting myself 100% for the first time in my life and it feels good. I'm drinking wayyyyyyy less and doing things with my days besides waiting around the house for a friend to get off work so we can get fucked up. Apparently word out on the street is that I'm not gonna make it out here. I'm going to prove everyone wrong, and in some ways I already have.

Anyways. This past weekend Kaitlin, Zach, Marcus and I went to Columbus. I was going to suprise Tom because he got home from Iraq but instead woke up to Tom jumping on me. We almost died on the way there in a snowstorm, got there at 3am, went to Hounddogs at 5am. Whiskey shots at 6am. Tom woke us up at 12. Then made quick visits, then party that night that made me never want to look at a bottle of Tanqueray ever again. Lunch with Suzy at the Dube the next day and then drive home. Most packed and insane 36 hours of my life.

I moved. It was completely unplanned but I feel good about it. I'm in a place where i feel at home and i havent had that in a couple years since i moved to Rhode Island. If I'm not drunk or with my friend I hate it there and have been miserable with he fact that I lived there from day one. Since being in Maryland I have felt better than I have felt in a long time. What I don't feel good about is the fact that people are upset with me over it. One person I can understand why they feel the way they do. Completely. But everyone else I just wish they would be happy for me because I'm happy. I'm a happier person here and feel like I made the right choice. I have only one friend so far who has stood by my decision onehundred percent so that cheers me up. I need to worry about myself. An opportunity came up and I'm not at a place in my life where I can pass one up. I understand I made commitments to people and I feel terrible that I ruined that and i am sorry for it. I don't really know anymore. As in what to say. My mom told me to live my life and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna listen to her for once.